My Dad was never really one for showing emotions, or letting other’s show their emotions either. After my Mom died all emotions ceased to exist entirely. Any problems we might have disappeared along with emotions. My depression didn’t exist. My suicide attempt never happened. To my Dad, it was easier to just never talk about it and move on. He was an expert compartmentalizer. So the fact that he could ignore his daughter’s months long absence really wasn’t that shocking to me.
I can remember a very distinct conversation my Dad and I had while I was hospitalized after my suicide attempt. The wounds on my arms were still very fresh and occasionally they would bleed through the gauze and bandages. On every meeting my Dad and I had in the hospital, we never acknowledged where I was. We would talk about his work and my school (never mentioning that I wasn’t there). We would talk about my favorite TV shows. We would eat lunch and discuss if the lunch was good or bad.
Well, on one fateful day, my wounds began to soak through my bandages. It got so bad that I couldn’t ignore it anymore. The blood was dripping on to my salad. My Dad continued to chew his lettuce, not noticing or at least compartmentalizing away. I finally called a nurse who changed the bandages so they were good as new.
I remember thinking “he can’t ignore this.” The nurse had to take off the bloody bandages right in front of him. She had to redress my arms right in front of him. I even winced a few times. When all was said and done, it took at least ten minutes. The whole while he chewed away at his salad.
I looked up at him, my teenage self expecting some kind of reassuring words. I remember what he said to this day. “The salad is excellent with the vinaigrette.”
Title: You Own Me
Author: Mary Catherine Gebhard
Genre: New Adult, Psychological Romance
“I’ll love you until you break my heart. I’ll give you the broken pieces of my heart as an offering to you, because you own it. Whole, shattered, alive, or dead; you own my heart no matter what condition it’s in. I’ll stay with you until you figure out how to feel. I’ll stay with you even if you never do.”
This is a story about happiness, and how it doesn’t simply happen because you fall in love.
Lennox is on the run from her ex-boyfriend. She had to drop everything, tell no one, and move to a new town, alone. She expected to be lonely, she expected to be afraid, but she never expected to meet a man named Vic who drove her crazy with lust and anger and called her “Lenny.” If it’s at all possible, Vic is more twisted than the man she ran away from.
She should ignore him, but they’re drawn to each other like magnets. Lennox ran from from Seattle to Santa Barbara to get away from violence, to create a new life, and to be something simple. Instead she’s found herself wrapped up in great friends and an epic love. This new life is the opposite of everything she wants, but it might just be everything she needs.
Mary Catherine Gebhard bites off more than she can chew and sometimes calls herself Eva Natsumi. She’s lived in Salt Lake City, Utah her entire life, but occasionally goes on vacation from reality. Don’t worry, she sends postcards.
ADD YOU OWN ME GOODREADS: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/22913328-you-own-me
Buy The Book:
Amazon eBook: Amazon (Kindle)
Amazon Paperback: Amazon (Paperback)